As if many dogs don’t have enough self esteem problems what with breed specific issues etc. , now our very own humans are holding us up to public ridicule! I’m talking about Dog Shaming.
Being the perfect dog, my Mom has no reason to shame me. She, however, should get a sign for making me wear that stupid Hawaiian shirt for that end of summer photo contest. I never did look at the camera so she had to give up on the idea of even entering.
I am speaking out for all of the dogs who have been shamed. I see nothing shameful about eating a dozen donuts and then the box. I bet there was a lot of yummy donut guts stuck to that box. And the poor dog who got shamed because he ate two sticks of butter, half a pound cake and a pan of dinner rolls. He must have been starving. And whose fault is that I ask you. Hey you humans grab a snack when you’re hungry, why shouldn’t we?
Maybe the dog that ate the little girl’s ice cream cone in the park went a little too far. He probably didn’t even get to enjoy it with all the crying, screaming and yelling that must have gone on. Have you ever heard a little girl cry? I rest my case.
To the dog that ate the $20.00 bill. Bad move dude. That $20.00 could have been used for treats or gas for riding in the car. Next time think. You may not have been hungry at all, only thirsty. A drink out of the toilet would have been a better option.
To all the dogs who have been shamed, you are not bad dogs; you’re just misunderstood. Here are a few of tips to avoid shaming.
1. Don’t get caught.
2. If you do get caught, blame it on the cat.
3. If you don’t have a cat handy, play on their heart strings. Look at your human with your most soulful look and for extra points, throw in the head tilt.
4. Do Not LOOK guilty, even if you are.
5. If all else fails and you get shamed, look right at the camera and use your most soulful look again. It may not work on your humans cuz they are used to it but it will work on other people. They will feel sorry for you and your humans will feel bad.
If you or any of your friends have been shamed, please share your story. You are among friends here.
P.S. Shameless self promotion. For all the Good Dogs out there, I have created a gift basket especially for you. I call it my Good Dog Spot Gift Basket and filled it with toys to keep you busy all day long. As we all know, a tired dog is a good dog.